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Author:
Kristina Tertyshnikova
Communicating in a cold context often seems strange, contrived, and unnatural. It’s usually hard to avoid this, as aside from the facts listed on a person’s online profile, we often know nothing about them. If it’s a very significant lead, of course, it’s worth doing some research to avoid making a bad impression, but what about when dealing with mass communication?
We have compiled a few phrases that can irritate or perplex someone when communicating with a stranger on the other side of the monitor. Some of these I’ve spotted in messages sent to me, others I’ve discovered in my conversation threads.
I’m sharing a top 10 list of phrases to be cautious with and suggestions for alternatives.
"Sorry to bother you..."
Don’t put yourself in an awkward position. If the person wants, they will make it clear themselves by saying they’re not interested in communicating. The dialogue is always of interest to you, so you tirelessly try to convey important and useful facts to the person.
Instead of worrying about bothering (you’re not calling them at 4 AM, after all!), add confidence and significance to your message.
"I will be happy to learn more about your business. When do you think I can pick your brain?"
This has become a nearly fixed expression for lead generation in LinkedIn, but it also requires rethinking and very careful use. It’s bad if you use this question without understanding or asking why the person should share about their business with you. Ideally, you should assess how relevant your product/service might be for this business. This can be determined in advance independently by conducting research.
Then, instead of asking this question, try to discuss the results of your research and conclude the benefits of your product or service and possible outcomes for this business. Ask the person if this is correct: "Are my conclusions right? What do you think about this?"
For example:
"Hi John! I did a small research about your company and want to share the results... Do you think I did everything correctly, and is the summary worth discussing?"
"I’m sure that it was excruciating and expensive to launch the MVP. Let’s talk, and I will find the solution for you."
Really? Let’s stop perceiving our cognitive biases as the only possible reality.
Share your genuine interesting experience, and explain that you’ve had e. g. 100 similar clients, all of whom faced problems with launching, and spending a lot of money and effort. Based on your experience, you can help new clients avoid these mistakes. Create a small list of typical problems during product launches or what you specialize in, and share this list. You can be certain only of your experience, everything else needs to be asked.
For example:
We have launched 30 MVPs in the last six months, and I can say it’s a tough thing to do! Our average results are: ...
What about you?
"I’m in the middle of the cust dev process and want you to be a part of it."
Or
"We are entering a new market and will be glad to share about our product."
This is a good phrase that explains why you’re reaching out to the lead, but it needs to be complemented with a description of the benefits for the person. Think about what you can offer:
- money
- fame (mention in a report that will be in a popular publication)
- tickets to an event
- consultation of an interesting expert
The second part about "sharing information about the product" also isn’t standalone, and it needs to be played in terms of potential benefits for the client, and society, not just you.
For example:
The thing is that more than 80,000 experts and teams use our tool in Europe, and now we are considering entering the new market.
So it would be useful for me to talk, and for you, we have a compensation + 6-month free subscription for our tool. Ready to give it a try?
"Would you be interested if I show you how to double your sales?"
Of course, yes! This old-school question aims to impress, warm up the lead, and spark interest. But today, everyone interprets this as: "Now I’m going to waste your time and sell you something unnecessary."
If you’ve asked such a question and captured the person’s attention but are unsure if there’s a quality match with the product or, worse, it turns out there isn’t one — run.
This either leads to spam or wasted time and likely frustration on both sides of the communication.
Here, I again suggest sharing your experience on how you’ve doubled/tripled sales for similar businesses, sharing unexpected solutions that worked best, and suggesting a review of the lead’s business.
For example:
"Please take a look at our TOP-10 sources for new leads in... Also, I wanted to share our fresh report devoted to... We use all the data to help our clients’ businesses grow and flourish."
"Dear John, if you are not the one who is in charge, may I ask who is the decision maker?"
Or
"If you know someone who might benefit and can recommend us, I will be extremely grateful."
Or
"I thought you might be the right person to connect with."
Qualification is great, but let’s care about our audience. The first version of the question about the decision-maker puts the person in an awkward position. It’s aggressive and does not encourage continuing the conversation about who makes the decisions.
The second option is better. The third suffers from the issue of false confidence.
Try to ask such questions carefully to not provoke the person into lying about being "the top person here, actually," or creating an awkward atmosphere that also won’t bring the deal any closer.
For example:
"Dear John, have you tried a product like this before? Who else on your team would be interested in learning about this?"
"What can I do at this point to make you talk to us?"
This puts a lot of pressure and responsibility on the person. The question may catch the person off-guard, and the situation could become uncontrollable. You might get no response, be sent away, or even be reported for spam.
At a stretch, this could be called a last call, when you’re sure you can burn through the rest of your base in case someone engages.
For example:
"Let me share the next steps worth making to understand your needs better and find the solution."
"By the way, we have the best tool..."
Offer the lead to look at the numbers, reviews, benchmarks, and citation index of your product. Use everything measurable, and only after that, make claims. Or better, ask the lead what they think about your numbers and if they would like to try such an amazing product.
For example:
"There are the numbers our tool showed in... industry for the last 3 months. Do you think you are ready to give it a try?"
"Hello, John! I am the CEO of COMPANY. I will be glad if you agree to connect and we will talk."
(And then not answering after the person accepted the invitation)
Here, I emphasize the lack of response after you initiated the conversation. The speed and success of the lead generation campaign depend maximally on the performance, responsibility, and discipline of the team, even if it’s a one-person team. Be consistent^; if you started writing — follow through to the end.
"To be honest..."
An obvious trap: were you not being honest with me before? Be careful with this turn of phrase. It’s simply an addition used by the speaker primarily to make themselves appear more important.
Let’s add importance with facts, not words!
Conclusion
Of course, phrases I’ve gathered can still be used, but it’s important to be mindful of such constructions to avoid mishaps. Keep this in mind, and for starters, recall your own experience: what cold messages annoyed you, and which ones you never respond to, or even flagged as spam?
A personalized approach to each lead is the most effective way to get a quality response. Try to adopt the best practices from this approach in mass communication.
Use facts, not conjectures and empty adjectives. Research your chosen audiences in advance. Don’t dig a hole for yourself by provoking the person to refuse communication. Offer value from the first interaction.
